I loved hearing your
thoughts yesterday on the poor. I had quite a few comments here and on
facebook (both on my page and my sister in law linda's page) that made me realize I need to clarify a few things.
I wanted to let you
know a little more background. When I was studying education, my time as
a cohort (the year before my internship) was spent commuting 40 minutes into a low-income area of salt lake
city. I wasn't assigned this, I chose this. There were about 20 of us that had decided to take on this challenge and not commit to a local utah valley school, but commit to an urban experience. Although you wouldn't think of SLC as too needy, you would be
wrong. It’s not inner-city Baltimore, but it was most definitely
impoverished. The school I taught
at was a high-risk title 1 school -little parental support, unruly kids, broken
homes, rough crowd. There were a lot of ESL kids and a lot from single
parent or "live with grandparent" homes. I enjoyed my time with those
kids immensely. I cherished that year-long opportunity. I learned a
great deal.
I didn't want
yesterday's post to somehow reflect that I didn't want to serve those
low-income kids in that downtown school. I did. When I walked up
those stairs and saw their faces I knew I could love them. But then
again, I could love any child. What bothered me was his line of thinking.
That these kids deserved a good teacher like me and that the other
schools were for teachers that didn't care to make a difference - that just
wanted the gifts the kids would offer. I was sent a message
on facebook yesterday from my cousin mentioning he didn't think the
principal was insinuating that "the poor
need a teacher like you, MORE than those other kids do, but that he was
just saying that these impoverished kids need positive influences in their
lives that they might not have in their homes". Well, he was saying
both. I didn't get into the details of all that the principal said, but he most
definitely had the impression that his students were more worthy of a good
teacher than the others were. And I wasn’t assuming, I knew he thought
this way. I knew him from district meetings and other encounters. I think there can be a
pridefulness in poverty. I think there can be a sense that serving or
teaching "poor children" is more noble than serving or teaching other
children. This was the impression I had of him.
Bottom line is that it wasn't that
I didn't want to work for those kids, it was that I didn't want to work for those ideals. I didn't want to work in an environment where I was
thrown on some kind of pedestal just because I worked at a needy school.
I didn't like that idea. As was mentioned by Linda on facebook - there is a
hierarchy of needs. All basic human rights should come first. No
child (person) deserves to go hungry, naked, homeless. I do agree that it
is our responsibility to help those with these great temporal needs. My
point yesterday was that there is no person not worthy of kindness and love.
Elevating one group of people as more deserving than another is not my
answer. The crack-head homeless
lady is just as deserving as the crack-head celebrity.
I loved Serena and Dave’s comments about doing
what we can. Serena mentioned that
the poverty of the world is overwhelming.
I am so very grateful for those in positions to travel and serve all
over the world. I have many
friends and relatives that have done really amazing things abroad. I want to do it too! I really feel a strong desire to travel
and do humanitarian work. Right
now is not my season. And although the inability to do so can be a depressing thought when there
is so much pain and suffering in the world, I can commit to do something for
the humanity that surrounds me.
And that can be just as noble.
5 comments:
Tiffany! I loved reading these posts. Thanks for your thoughts. I am always bothered by the phrase “the poor.” It unnecessarily defines, labels and categorizes people. The poor are a group to be pitied and fixed by the non-poor. I know we are taught to help the poor, but too often we derive some sense of superiority in that process. During Sunday’s lesson, I couldn’t help but wonder how many of us in the class would be considered poor by someone else’s standards, and if we thought about each other that way, would it change our perspective about them? Even in my most poverty-stricken days, I resented being labeled that way.
Your posts are so great-they explain that each of us has needs, and does that not make us all poor in some way? We don’t live in a world of only poor and only rich. Some who have meager temporal means are so very rich in spiritual gifts, which they can use to enrich the wealthiest of people.
The Savior teaches that “blessed are the poor in spirit who come unto me, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” This takes the pity out of being poor and changes it into something to achieve.
I've loved both of these posts about this issue, and I COMPLETELY understand where you're coming from, and it appears that we had unbelivably similar experiences. Though I taught High School, not elementary school my story is the same. I did my student teaching in an inner-city school in Washington D.C., and I loved that experience more than I can describe. I did feel that those kids needed me in a way I'd never really experienced. The things they were dealing with and the baggage they carried was enough to break my heart every day, and I left that experience convinced that I wanted to continue to help kids in that situation. So, I came back to Utah because this dumb boy (who luckily ended up becoming my awesome husband) convinced me to, and I began searching for a job. I interviewed at the alternative High School in Provo in the same week that I interviewed at Alta High School in Sandy. The 2 schools could not have been more different. Alta was full of unbelievably affluent kids with parents who were either overly involved or too rich to care. I was offered both jobs, and I couldn't believe that I was torn over the possibility. Independence High School in Provo was exactly what I thought I wanted, but for some reason when I went to Alta for my interview it felt like home and where I was supposed to be. So, though I wasn't exactly sure why at the time I took the job at Alta.
After my experience in D.C. and teaching for 3 years at Alta I can echo your remarks in saying that all children need good teachers who care about them, and all children have problems and trials great and small, but they are different. I loved the kids I taught in both places and my heart ached for them in different ways. I wanted to take over and solve all of their problems, but I couldn't. I helped them, but expected them to do what was asked. So, Tiffany, thank you, and know that I completely agree.
Michele -- what great insight. "the poor are pitied and to be helped by the non-poor" -- love that you are in tune with this negative labeling. labeling in any way is no good. labels come with baggage and stereotypes. no one deserves that.
maryclaire, your experience is such a valuable addition to this discussion, thank you so much for taking the time to share. I saw what you did and realized that my heart too ached in different ways. I think it is easy to have compassion for the poor, but to have compassion for the rich is not as easy. It takes a whole new perspective and understanding. Thanks again for sharing. A friend of mine did the DC thing too -- she commented on the last post!
Ah yes, I have so much to say and wished I just lived next door. Gee whiz. The labeling thing- right on. See my post about the 3 c's. TOTally. And then there was me = from DC area-- at BYU thinking I was somehow 'better' because I had experienced all the atrocities that come with living near DC, seeing the plight of the homeless up close, having a disfunctional family myself that became that way- I believe- by both parents working a total of 3 jobs trying to make ends meet, but I wouldn't have been labeled poor- just not preppy- and probably 'not cool' LOL. Anyhow, I remember thinking that roommates should 'go out and see the world' since they seemed to be so uninformed and tunnel vision impaired at BYU- and then I came to the realization that seeing a lot of muck does not make a person a better person, but choosing to be Christlike everyday, no matter where a person is- looking for ways to help (and not justify not doing it or avoiding it)....
How silly that anyone could judge your choice.
And how ultra strange I feel is the "we are poor therefore you are obligated to help us" speech. Don't get me wrong- Jared signs up here in Davis to help drive the homeless to shelters, and we give to the people on the streets and help pick up hands of less fortunate families hanging down-- but when it comes across from THEM as being exPECted of me because of their position-- it makes me feel this knee jerk sense of them putting ME into a labeled box and sizing me up unfairly (stupid- i know) and I think it would be weird to work for a principal with that kind of an attitude (well meant or not).
A guy at my door recently was trying to sell magazines to help him get points for a trip to Italy, and was pretty good at his game, and what I didn't want to spend 40 bucks on for me, I could spend for "children in a hospital"- and at the end when I decided that on our student budget this would be ridiculous (seems how I spend no more than 50 cents a book for my own kid at yard sales) I said no, and he asked, "So you don't want to help?" (so manipulative!) and I said, "No. I don't. And I don't feel bad about that because of all the things we are already doing to help those around us."
Jared sat in the back listening most of the time and said he just wondered what I'd say.
A lot of people in positions of influence are out for themselves these days- a person really just has to follow their heart and do what self thinks is right-- not what soandso says you should do because he is entitled to your help/your personality/your energy/your strength/your knowledge.
Jess, thank you so much for your thoughtful comment. It sounds like you are doing wonderful things where you are. thank you for sharing your experience about coming out to utah. I think that you are not alone in feeling that way or having that impression. I think once we realize that so many are struggling (but in perhaps different ways than are as noticeable as what you saw in dc) we can begin to have compassion and love everywhere life takes us. There are always hellos and smiles to give, people to give rides to, people to befriend.
And I was TOTALLY scammed by the magazine kids. We bought two magazines from them and never received them. I am just sad that they are a part of something so sketchy. I don't even know if they know all the time. I tell those that come to my door now that we won't buy from them because it is a dishonest company and we like to help people but we can't contribute to a dishonest cause.
It's so hard to know what to do. I think you are great JEss, keep up the good that you are doing! I know I can do more!
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